Wedding Daze

Confetti

Went to a wedding today. We went to the service and then the reception and then came home. Everything was great, even the weather. Number one wife was going out to the evening party, whilst I stayed at home and nursed the jetlag. Before she went out again I thought I'd print off a few of the photos I'd taken. Bad plan. The process went like this.

1. Upload pictures to computer. Select picture and press print.
2. HP printer drops out the print onto 6x4 as requested, but the ink cartridge has run out.
3. Insert new ink cartridge.
4. Printer refuses to do cartridge alignment.
5. Take out all paper. Reset printer. Put paper back in. Reset printer again. Printer does alignment.
6. Restart print.
7. Printer prints out picture on A4 paper, not 6x4.
8. Move lever on printer to get the right size. Print again.
9. One good print. Hurrah. Print two more. Works again. Hurrah.
10. Move on to next picture. Select print, ask for three copies. Go for cup of tea.
11. Come back and find that all three copies have groom's head cut off.
12. Examine the pictures carefully and note that all photographs are being cropped.
13. Spend ten minutes trying to figure out how to get the HP driver to print the actual size that I want.
14. Discover that this is impossible.
15. Select another picture with groom's head closer to the middle. Ask for three copies. Go watch some Dr Who.
16. Come back and find that the 6x4 paper has run out, so the printer has printed the three copies on A4.
17. Load some more 6x4 paper in and ask for three more copies.
18. One print comes out, with the picture diagonally across it as it has not loaded properly.  Printer then stops and flashes a red light.
19. Give single print to number one wife, and walk away from the computer/printer before I do it some serious damage.

Comments

[Martin Bryant]

I am staring at a PC on which I have tried to install windows three times and it still doesn't work. (No, not the one I am typing on, another one.) I'm not going to try again. I'm going to do some ironing. I like irons. They work and don't require updating.

[Simon]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

[Martin Bryant]

Yes. It still gets hot.

[Rob]

Not sure about irons. I used one on my shirt at TechEd. Half way through it turned itself off (apparently this is a "safety feature") and deposited a huge smear of snot coloured liquid right down the front of the shirt.

Yes, I had to turn it off and turn it back on again......