I should be on the stage....

What is the most popular image editing program in the jungle?
Photoshop elephants.

Do cowgirl cinderallas have prarie godmothers?

What kind of games console can you drink?
Playstation potable.

..thank you and good night

Grand Theft Not Yet

Today I went up town with a spring in my step and thirty five quid in my pocket (this equates to nearly two week's pocket money - since I got the car I'm on iron rations gadget wise, so that Mr. Cahoot doesn't fail to get his funds).

I intended to buy Grand Theft Auto for my Playstation Portable. Now I know that the game is vulgar, violent and generally horrible in most respects. But I do rather enjoy playing it. I had heard that it was due for launch on the 28th of October and I was looking forward to getting my hands on a copy and tearing up Liberty City all over again.

Of course I had forgotten that there are lies, big lies, complete whoppers and video game release dates. The game has been put back to next week. So I returned home with less of a spring in my step, and no video game.

At least it means that when I get it I will have saved up for it.....

Scary Software Engineering

I thought it was time to do a tutorial session on how to take Software Designs and make them into real software. So today I spend a couple of hours with the second year using Visual Studio to create classes and link them to each other. I hope it wasn't too scary folks. I'm very worried that I might end up with a bunch of people who can draw lots of pretty diagrams but don't know how to make the program that actually does the work. Those that stayed to the end seemed fairly happy.

If some bits didn't make sense, don't worry - I'll be doing more of this later.

Trip Hazard is coming....

I'm busy writing the fifth installment of "Trip Hazard - Los Angeles Private Eye who will also work for publicly quoted companies". I've not written the first four yet, maybe I never will.

I'll let you know when it's ready. It might even come out in podcast form if I can come up with a convincing american accent. Just as a taster, here is the cast:

Trip Hazard: an LA PI who nearly always does the right thing. In his own way. Cast aside by the LAPD for a crime he probably didn�t commit he now wages war on the side of the angels in the city of the angels, helped by his treasured �74 open top Mustang and numerous friends and acquaintances. First seen in the pilot programme: �This Shield May Not Be for Hire�

Mycroft Strange: sometime sidekick to Trip who finds his classically trained, British Empire background a help and hindrance in equal parts. A mystic codebreaker who also worked for MI5 he joined forces with Trip in episode two; �Eat Lead for Breakfast�

Koyoto: Enigmatic Japanese beauty with brains to match. Teamed up with Trip in episode three; �Ninja Motorbike Assassins from Tokyo� when he saved her from a life of high octane crime.

Beverley Vermont: Wisconsin Cheese heiress who, due to her inadvertent involvement in a Mafia yoghurt scam, ended Trip�s police career. Returns to become his full time lover in episode four; �Milk isn�t the only thing that curdles�.

Archibald Nemisis : a childhood friend of Trip who has since gone over to the wrong side of the tracks and lives in a disused station there. Now a boss of a huge underworld syndicate which also operates above ground. Really the cause of Trip�s downfall, and nurses a non-secret passion for Beverley. Although he wouldn�t kick Koyoto out of bed either. Introduced in episode one.

Drop that Motherboard in the River

Ha. I don't have the voice of an express train going past. What I have is a motherboard with an idiot sound card. I' re-recorded my dulcet tones using a different piece of hardware and all is well. I still sound a bit stupid, but I'm reliably informed by experts that I've always sounded a bit stupid. So all is well then.

I think that my PC knows I'm onto it. This evening, to celebrate its failure to record sound and the sudden departure of most of my USB devices it failed completely. I think it may have an appointment with the council tip.....