Wednesday
Dec152004
Heists
Wednesday, December 15, 2004 at 09:04PM
Watched a TV program last night called Heist. A gang of hardened criminals are given a task each week and a film crew track them as they go about their nefarious business. This week they had to steal a one million pound car and take it Belgium. Why Belgium was not made clear. Perhaps there are people wandering round Brussels going "I just wish there was someone I could buy a stolen car worth one million pounds from".
Anyhoo, the gang soon got into the spirit of the occasion and were happily plotting away. The one fly in the ointment was that, this being a sort of family show, they weren't allowed to bash anybody over the head with a crowbar, that being the most effective way of achieving some of the more physical parts of the challenge. Instead they had to create a fake site entrance and dress up as security men to get their hands on their ill gotten gains.
One thing that impressed me was that all the villains looked exactly like they had been hired straight from central casting. The bluff boss, the gentleman cat thief, the hard man and the brainy one all looked just as you would expect. Only the computer hacker spoiled things a bit by looking remarkably like Jesus Christ, but there you go.
The plot ran through to completion quite satisfactorily, although the action was intercut with scenes that were supposed to leave you with the impression that crime doesn't actually pay. Smuggling the car to Belgium was in fact the easiest part of the job, this being achieved by putting the car on a lorry and driving the lorry through customs and out of the country. However, at this point the narration did point out that if they really had stolen such a valuable artifact this bit might have been a bit more tricky, what with ports and stuff all having been alerted.
The funniest bit was when, having tricked the driver out of the cab of his lorry, they put him at ease by saying "Don't worry, it's not a real robbery, we are all from Channel 4". This seemed to work remarkably well. Perhaps alongside jemmy, gelignite, swag bag and the like we will start to see criminals using video cameras, clipboards and producers in future.
Anyhoo, the gang soon got into the spirit of the occasion and were happily plotting away. The one fly in the ointment was that, this being a sort of family show, they weren't allowed to bash anybody over the head with a crowbar, that being the most effective way of achieving some of the more physical parts of the challenge. Instead they had to create a fake site entrance and dress up as security men to get their hands on their ill gotten gains.
One thing that impressed me was that all the villains looked exactly like they had been hired straight from central casting. The bluff boss, the gentleman cat thief, the hard man and the brainy one all looked just as you would expect. Only the computer hacker spoiled things a bit by looking remarkably like Jesus Christ, but there you go.
The plot ran through to completion quite satisfactorily, although the action was intercut with scenes that were supposed to leave you with the impression that crime doesn't actually pay. Smuggling the car to Belgium was in fact the easiest part of the job, this being achieved by putting the car on a lorry and driving the lorry through customs and out of the country. However, at this point the narration did point out that if they really had stolen such a valuable artifact this bit might have been a bit more tricky, what with ports and stuff all having been alerted.
The funniest bit was when, having tricked the driver out of the cab of his lorry, they put him at ease by saying "Don't worry, it's not a real robbery, we are all from Channel 4". This seemed to work remarkably well. Perhaps alongside jemmy, gelignite, swag bag and the like we will start to see criminals using video cameras, clipboards and producers in future.
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