Don't believe everything you read on the net

Went down to Reading today to give a talk for Microsoft. Being of sound mind I went onto the Travlodge web site (for it is they that will be providing me with a bed for the night) and got an AA provided route to their location.

Or did I?

Upon arrival I just followed the route as supplied. Which took me to a jet ski lake in the middle of nowhere. Not amusing. It turns out that the AA router just takes the postcode (which must cover an area around the size of Canada) and then finds the place in it which is furthest from the point you want to be.

When I finally arrived at my location, around an hour late and somewhat upset, I asked the receptionist if anyone had ever mentioned that the route to chez Travelodge, as downloaded from their web site was, shall we say, a little cuckoo. She groaned and shook her head. "It is wrong", she admitted, "But there is nothing we can do about it".

Apparently Head Office, which runs the web site and is probably noting a downward trend in arrivals at this particular lodge and may even be preparing a crack team of accountants (can you have such a thing? he wondered) to go in and fire all the staff, has been alerted but has not done anything about the problem. Good for them.

A word of warning to the wise from an idiot. Do not trust the AA directions. (actually, as I remember I've had problems with them before). Use the RAC or (dare I suggest such a thing) a paper map.

An Appeal

We tuned over to BBC 2, University Challenge just in time to hear the quizmaster say:

"Michael Howard and Britney Spears. Correct"

But what was the question? What was the question?

Not Really Sunday

There is something really relaxing about the Sunday before a Bank Holiday. Everything is in the normal "Sunday" place, but you don't have to go to work the next day. Lovely.

Heading For Darwin

As I stood in a high wind balanced on a stool directing the pressure washer jet over my head onto the roof of the conservatory this afternoon I reflected that this was just the kind of thing that people do before making an appearence in the celebrated Darwin awards, which are usually awarded postumously to people who prove that Darwin was right by doing stupid things which subsequently kill them.

As it happens I was lucky, and nothing particularly bad happened. I had taken the precuation of not drinking fifteen pints of Bud before starting out (which most winners usually do). The major irritation was that pesky wind, which sent clouds of water back over me in a most unfortunate way, so I did get very wet. But now the roof of the conservatory is nice and clean.

The Force is Strong in This One

A long time ago in a Galaxy Far Away (tm) a bloke called George made a nice little film. It was self contained, had special effects that were way ahead of its time and a really good orchestral score. And he kept all the merchandising rights. The film was a big, big, big success. And so George set about making the enterprise into a franchise, making out like it was always meant to be that way. And like a kid caught out on a big lie, he made bigger and bolder lies to try and cover himself.

George: "This is really one of nine films you know"
Audience: "No way"
George: "Way. And you know Luke's love interest?"
Audience: "Yeah, that Princess with the funny hair"
George: "She's really his sister."
Audience: "No way. You'll be telling us next that Darth is Luke's dad.."
George: "Hmm..... Do you like teddy bears?"

..and so on. Actually George did two clever things after Star Wars 1 (or is it 4), sell a lot of plastic toys and make the thing into a soap opera. And so now we come to "Star Wars 3, The Revenge of the Sith". My expectations were pretty low. And they were confounded quite a bit. The film was great (although it did make the person behind me burst into tears at the end).

The acting was a bit wooden and there was a whole lot too much going on. All the poignant bits between Annakin and his wife were played out to a background of zillions of spaceships going aimlessly back and forth, like a love scene being played out in front of the M1 motorway. Even the final death bed scene of the princess (hope I'm not giving too much away here folks) had a pointless flashing blue light in the background. Why a flashing light? And why blue?

All the fight scenes were huge, as if George had watched the Lord of the Rings and said to the production team "I want all three episodes worth in one two minute sequence". But the film was still good. And considering the origins of the story, it actually held together pretty well.

If nothing else the film proves that the shopping centres in the UK that have banned people wearing hooded sweatshirts are definitely on to something. At the beginning of the film Annakin is hoodless and happy, trading quips with his jedi master as he battles evil. By the end he is deeply hooded, just like his nasty boss. And his eyes light up too, which is always a bad thing.

In short, if you want an uplifting experience with snappy dialogue and a light romantic nature, then don't go and see this film. If you want to see how it all ends/starts then it is definitely worth a trip.