One One liner

I won't say he's unlucky, but he went on a blind date and her guide dog bit him.....

No more big eyes

I've got my new proper working glasses now. They have replaced the "bug eyed" ones that I used to have to wear. I'm glad I've got rid of them, as they were scaring people who dropped by my office when I was in the middle of using the computer. The new ones look remarkably like my "proper" glasses, which means that I've taken to wearing them by mistake as I wander off down the corridor. It is only when I'm around 100 feet from my office that I realise that I can only see things that are exactly 18 inches away from my nose, and that everything else is a pleasantly coloured blur. I then have to navigate my way back crashing into walls and doors as I do so. Wonderful.

Actually, wearing more than one pair of glasses is actually quite useful. When you get asked a hard question by a student you can do something like:

Say "Well.....". Take off glasses thoughtfully, clean them, put them back in the case, take out other pair of glasses, clean them even more thoughtfully and carefully, put them on, stare intently at the computer screen for a few seconds and press a few keys. Tthen take off close up glases, put on normal glasses, turn to face student and continue "....that all depends."

Writers Block

In a vain (in both senses of the word - but not the medical one) attempt to promote my literary prowess I've started a new section of my new robmiles.com web presence dedicated to my writings. It presently just contains a full version of my seminal "The Little Brown Ikea Pencil of Doom" and a work in progress of Trip Hazard. If enough people comment on the stuff there I might write some more. Provided you say nice things.

Pub Nite Prius Capers

Pub nite tonight. A chance to sit around and solve the problems of the universe. And create a few new ones. I explained my scheme for messing with people's heads using a Toyota Prius. This is a car which has a drive mechanism which allows it to be powered by an electric motor and so move along virtually silently.

Now you know how when a car passes you at speed it goes EEEEEEAAAAAWWWWW as the doppler effect makes it first sound high pitched as it comes towards you and then low pitched as it whizzes away? Well, I want to mount a speaker on a silent Prius that goes WWWWWAAAAAEEEEE as it goes past. So to the person it is passing the car just seems to go AAAAAAAAAAAAAA. (are you getting this). I was kind of wondering if people would actually notice that the car sounds more like a flying saucer than a real car.

Ian and Pete were mildly taken with the concept once I had got the idea accross. But not so taken as to buy a Prius and try it. If any (or either) of my readers gets round to doing this I'd love to know the result.

Imogene Heap Quite Literally Rocks

If you are a serious student of my blog (and who isn't) you will have heard me go on about Imogene Heap. Lots. If you have not bought or downloaded her album "Speak for Yourself" then shame on you (but also your loss). Anyhoo, some time back I found that she was playing in York, just down the road. Tickets at only ten pounds a pop? Take the whole family. So I did.

We started the evening with a meal in Pizza Hut. Once we had found one that could be persuaded to serve us. The first one was too busy to let us in. The second one let us in grudgingly. They all seemed surprised by the number of people who wanted to eat tea at tea time. Perhaps they should advertise less. The good news is that they were recruiting new staff. The part we were in was the holding pen for applicants who were sat forlornly formulating a satisfactory response to the question "Why do you want to work at Pizza Hut?". Actually, we thought of one or two good answers. But none that would actually get us a job... The meal deal we had entitled us to a free trip to the "Ice Cream Factory"....



What can I say? I'm off chocolate for Lent. And no, I didn't actually manage to eat all this.

On the way to the venue the sky started doing interesting things:



I thought pictures like this were always faked. But this isn't. Honest.

And then in to the concert.



Like we will be needing those...

Just about everyone at the concert was a fraction of my age. And not a big fraction either. It kind of took me back to school disco days. Anyhoo, they were all fans too, from the way that they responded to the particular track announcements.

The evening kicked off with a set by Zoe Keating. I'd have loved to have heard her under slightly quieter circumstances. The noise of the people at the bar kind of got in the way of her cello playing, but what I did here was lovely. Another one to watch I think. Owing to being trapped on a sofa, I didn't actually managed to get a picture of her playing, but you can find out more here.

Then, at around 9:30, just as advertised, Imogene Heap took to the stage. By gum she was good. I've heard sets before where the singer doesn't have the "live voice" or the backing to sound right. She did. Stuff I've heard before and stuff I haven't sounded splendid.


In blue


In deep blue


In deeply trippy


In red.

Then it was off back down the A1079 (the most evil road in the known universe) and home to bed. Thanks for a great evening Ms. Heap. It was wonderful to hear such a good performer who seemed to be enjoying doing her stuff in front of a live audience. Here's to the next tour. We'll be there.